beltane musings...

Nick Walters 10 years ago

well, I am still drawing, and I think I'm getting somewhere - of course I'm trying not to care whether I'm getting somewhere or not bit that inner critic can't help pushing me forward...

..and I think its a good thing, I'm really enjoyimg the 'craft' of working with simplicity - the same position of the face, the same paper, the same pencil, the same time of day/ light...

and really enjoying the pieces as they emerge, really from a different place to where I normally think/ act from - allowing something else to take over and shutting down part of my chattering mind.. I think thats why booze is so nice because it seems to do a similar thing - got to watch that..

the subtelties are interesting - each drawing there is something different I'm working on, solving - mouth today - the other day it was foreshortening - something has shifted there and I actually can't explain what - which is wonderful - it's a mixture of things..

..and my therapy/ self-development process cannnot be dissassociated.. and my trans-sexual fascination and embodiment - I can't help it, I can't deny it, and no - one is reading this so it doesn't matter - its good to find other artists that have been fascinated by gender stereotyping - from Frida Kahlo, Diane Arbuss - and just discovered Pep Bonet and Christer Stromholm -both creating stunning black and white images.. of men nd women - exploring this..

a sense of self.. a sense that the gender, relationship, etrc.. roles we've assumed are a bit, well, boring.. and that maybe there is this amazing other world where its all mixed up and we can play...

aaaah - well, booze and blogging is a dangerous edge.. I hope I can keep going with this blog 'cause I find it a really great tool for my artistic practise - bit sadly I am coming to the end of this thing so may have to find another blog ..

started another painting - of myself - oh dear - nt happy at all - the drawing has really evolved but the painting needs some attention...

lots of transexual, cross-dressing love to anyone whose bothered to read this...

xxx